MsBurb is RICH!…In Canadian Tire Money, that is…

Canada-CanadianTireMoney-SocialCommentary 1 Yep.
I know, I know.
Stand back. Don’t crowd me. I KNOW me and my Canadian Tire $$$ are wanted and desired.
And back off already ‘cause I'll demand a nuptial agreement, rest assured that you won’t get your paws on my CT loot!
Okay, those Americans in the reading audience are shaking their heads, I’m sure, (Canadian Tire money is like monopoly money, that you receive as a cash refund every time you purchase something at this automotive/hardware department store, and then you can accumulate these bills, which come in 5, 10, 25 and 50 cent and $1 amounts, and trade them in for free stuff at Canadian Tire…there, now you know!) but for us Canucks, do I really have to say anything more?
And I’m not proud either. I’ll try to scoff some from inside my friends’ cars, I’ll embezzle it from my own Mother, and if need be, I’ll fight the bum on the street for his last nickel CT note!
Now, of course, this may be viewed as a sign of mental imbalance to others, when I myself just think that amassing the stuff may be the only way I’ll ever compete with Buffet, Gates or Trump…it’s not like my family owns a Canada-CanadianTireMoney-SocialCommentary 2 sugar plantation, you know!
So yes, my wealth WILL BE amassed in Canadian Tire money…
“What do you plan on doing with it all, MsBurb?”
Funny you should ask…
I could cash it in for, say, a brand new set of Canada-CanadianTireMoney-SocialCommentary 3 wiper blades or a sparkling new can of Canada-CanadianTireMoney-SocialCommentary 4 10-W-40, or God forbid if I get enough of it, an authentic Canada-CanadianTireMoney-SocialCommentary 5 Canadian Tire Foam Beer Holder!
But I dunno..
The fun is in Canada-CanadianTireMoney-SocialCommentary 6 amassing, isn’t it? I mean, wouldn’t that be the answer Buffet, Gates or Trump would give?
I mean how many Lear Jets can Trump own and how many Foam Beer Holders can MsBurb own?
Suppress the excess, I always say!
Nah, my best plan for my CT $$$ is that near the end of my life, I shall book a suite at the Caesar’s Palace in Las Vegas, go nowhere, see no one, play no games, hit no pools, dump my loot on my ceiling-mirrored heart-shaped bed and just rollllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll around in it buck naked, ‘til my heart gives out and I die a happy camper.
I haven’t decided who will inherit my vast estate of automotive trinkets bought over the years with my previously accumulated CT loot. I think I’ll wait for some Toy-Boy to come along and have his way with me, knowing full well what he’s really in it for…ahhhhhhhh….


Sarah said…
i'm not sure about how you want to end your life in buck naked..i mean, other people have to look at you for pete's sake. lol

and what on earth is canadian tire money??
MsBurb said…
Yeahhhhh, I knowwwww, aren't I baaaaaad?!

Sarah, I thought you were from Canada?

CT $$$ are look-a-like monopoly money bills that you get back as a cash refund every time you buy something at this automotive/hardware store called Canadian Tire. This store has been giving these coupon bills out for decades and decades and is one of the last all Canadian owned department stores in Canada.

I KNEW I should have added an explanation in the post but it would have ruined the effect...sigh...
MsBurb said…
Oh, yeah, and then you can accumulate these bills, which are in 5, 10, 25, 50 cent, and $1 amounts, and trade them for free stuff at the CT store...
Sarah said…
no my mom lives in canada - vancouver. i unfortunately know very little about canada. so if the store closes you're sh*t out of luck?
MsBurb said…
Oh, I see...

Yes, I am taking a risk, aren't I, but they're franchised like the Napa stores in the I'm pretty safe (tee hee)!
Anonymous said…
I once paid a toll here in the United States using Canadian Tire money.

By the time the toll taker actually did his job, I was heading down the road!

MsBurb said…
Okay, it's official!

You're frying in Hell for THAT one, TM!!!


Popular Posts